McKenzie started 1st grade this year on August 23rd. She was so excited to be able to go back to school. She said she even wanted to sleep there! I told her no way of course! What a silly girl.
McKenzie first day of school:
Madisynn started preschool September 7th. She has been looking forward to going to school as well. She has been bugging me since I signed her up in march.
Madisynn's first day of preschool:
I have been in denial, I haven't wanted school to start. I've been pretty grumpy, and I think it's because my girls are growing up so fast. I cried the whole way home from taking Madisynn to school. I was actually home all alone for the first time in I don't know how long. It was so weird. I have tasted freedom, and now I don't know what I want to do. I still don't know if I want to have anymore kids. I want to have a baby for all the right reasons, not because my baby is now in preschool. I really need to know and feel it deep inside, and I don't feel it. When I hold a baby, I do enjoy it, but It's nice to give the baby back to the parents. I sometimes think oh this would be nice, but then I hear the crying and I just feel so relieved that I don't have to take care of a baby. I feel selfish, I just really wish I knew. That I would get some answers. I'm not getting any younger, and my girls are getting older, and that is a big age gap. I don't know what to do. Any advice would be nice. Thanks.
5 comments:
Your girls look super cute heading off to school! I can't believe how old they are already!
Since you asked for it... having lived in Asia and seeing so many children living without or not being cared for, I have definitely developed an opinion about having children. I think that if a couple can provide a good home and loving parenting, they should have as many kids as possible. With that said, I also believe "as many kids as possible" involves a different number for everyone and if one child is the most a couple can love and take care appropriately, that is all they should have. On the other hand, if a couple can have 12 kids and take care of them fully, then that's what they should have! I definitely believe Heavenly Father has a plan for us, and you should do what you feel is right for you and your family. Love you and good luck in those big decisions!
Your girls are gorwing up so fast....they are super cute!! I love little Madisynn's backpack too!
About the not having anymore kids..this is one I had wrestled with too the past year. Its such a hard decision when your on the fence! I totally agree with the previous poster...Heavenly Father has a plan for us,whether that includes 2 kids or 8 kids! I think that if you feel at peace with your descision, then thats what matters. If you feel deep down that there is another little one waiting to come down and be part of your family, then ofcourse you better go for it.
Personally....I would LOVE to have another baby...I love Newborns!! However, I now know that we are done...and I feel at peace with that....after all I could be a Grandma in 8-10 years. Yikes!! lol
Do what's right for you. Nobody can tell you otherwise.
I'm glad you are blogging again. Your girls are so sweet and cute!
Thanks you guys! I really needed some advice. You have all helped!
Karen you are such a good mom. Don't beat yourself up about not feeling right about a baby. If you are praying about it then you will be prompted to do the thing that is right. I have friends with big gaps in their family's ages, and for them it is great and they love it. Be patient until the answer comes. Sure love you!
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